E. A. Black writes dark fiction, dark fantasy, and horror. She writes erotic romance and erotica with the pseudonym Elizabeth Black. Visit her web sites at http://elizabethablack.blogspot.com and http://eablack-writer.blogspot.com. Friend her at Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/elizabethablack
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[Image from Punch an Pie, by Chris Daily and Aeire]
I've edited many books as exchanges for my own edits or as a favor. One thing I've noticed is
that sex scenes are sometimes dragged down by the same old descriptive words:
cock, pussy, cunt, willie, shaft, slit. Blah de blah de blah.
Sometimes you have to shake up the words, but you don't want
to go overboard and end up writing purple prose. It's too easy to let yourself
fall into Bulwer-Lytton
Awards territory, like the 2012 winner, runner up, and dishonorable
mentions in the Romance category:
Winner:
“I’ll never get over him,” she said to herself and the truth
of that statement settled into her brain the way glitter settles on to a
plastic landscape in a Christmas snow globe when she accepted the fact that she
was trapped in bed between her half-ton boyfriend and the wall when he rolled
over on to her nightgown and passed out, leaving her no way to climb out. —
Karen Hamilton, Seabrook, TX
Runner-Up:
“Your eyes are like deep blue pools that I would like to
drown in,” he had told Kimberly when she had asked him what he was thinking;
but what he was actually thinking was that sometimes when he recharges his
phone he forgets to put the little plug back in but he wasn’t going to tell her
that. — Dan Leyde, Edmonds, WA
Dishonorable Mention:
Tucked in a dim corner of The Ample Bounty Bar & Grille,
Alice welcomed the fervent touch of the mysterious stranger’s experienced hands
because she had not been this close with a man in an achingly long time and,
quivering breathlessly, began to think that this could be the beginning of
something real, something forever, and not just a one-time encounter with a
good Samaritan who was skilled at the Heimlich Maneuver. — Mark Wisnewski,
Flanders, NJ
Chain-smoking as he stood in the amber glow of the street
lamp, he gazed up at the brownstone wherein resided Bunny Morgan, and thought
how like a bunny Bunny was, though he had read somewhere that rabbits were
coprophages, which meant that they ate their own feces, which was really
disgusting now that he thought about it, and nothing like Bunny, at least he
hoped not, so on second thought Bunny wasn’t like a bunny after all, but she
still was pretty hot. — Emma DeZordi, Dollard-des-Ormeaux, Quebec
Their love began as a tailor, quickly measuring the nooks
and crannies of their personalities, but it soon became the seamstress of
subterfuge, each of them aware of the others lingual haberdashery: Mindy trying
to create a perfectly suited garment to display in public and Stan only
concerned with the inseam. — D. M. Dunn, Bloomington, IN
So you want to use words other than The Usual Suspects? How
about some of these substitutions (From The
Glossary Of Sexual Slang):
anus
asshole, bung hole, butt hole
breasts
boobs, headlights, knockers, tits
buttocks
ass, behind, buns, butt, fanny, rear
clitoris
button, clit
penis
cock, dick, dong, joy stick, meat, organ, pecker, peter,
poker, prick, rod, tool, wang, weenie
semen
come, cream, cum, jism, load, love juice
testicles
balls, family jewels, gonads, gones, nuts
vagina (or vulva)
bearded clam, bearded lady, beaver, box, cunt, honey pot,
manhole, muff, pussy, quim, snatch,
toolbox, twat
Other substitutions:
vagina (or vulva)
fiery slit, cleft, folds, velvet curtains
cock
joystick, hammer, love muscle
You get the idea. There are all kinds of creative words you
could use when writing your sex scenes. Just make sure you don't cringe when
you use them.
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